Tuesday, December 16, 2014

6 Months Young!

Silas turned 6 months old last Tuesday! How terrible of me to be so delayed in this post! Actually, scratch that. I was busy being a mom. Doing mom things.
And......life with a 6 month old is much busier than life with a newborn! Sure, as a first time mom, you're experiencing a great learning curve in those first few weeks and months. By 6 months, you've got this parenting thing pretty nailed down (so far, for the most part), but your little baby isn't content to sleep for hours on end during the day, or nurse quietly in your arms for hours on end either!
Silas is a busy little growing person all of his own. I think he will have a big personality. I can see it coming through already - I believe he will he kind and social and funny and determined. He is just progressing in leaps and bounds - sitting up on his own, independent play, making choices between toys, good motor skills, using his growing vocabulary of sounds to chat....the list goes on. It is truly amazing. 

We are still experiencing a rolling-over strike. He prefers to play sitting up, but will play on his tummy happily for 20 or so minutes.....but then get really pissed off when he doesn't want to be on his stomach anymore. He. Just. Won't. Roll anymore. Hates it. Won't do it. CAN do it. Won't. Someone might be a little stubborn just like his mommy and daddy.......

He's been eating three solid meals and day (sometimes he hates his high chair and won't eat calmly until I feed him on my lap...hopefully this is a passing phase and once we start the baby led weaning approach, he will feel more in control), and is nursing 6-8 times a day. Sleep is decent. He generally goes to bed between 6 and 7 pm, up to nurse between 11 and midnight, again sometime between 2 and 3 am, and then awake around 6:30 am. Occasionally he wakes up around 5:30, and can put himself back to sleep about 50% of the time (the other 50% of the time, he comes to bed with us because that is farrrrr tooooooo earrrrrllyyyyyyy).

Our loose daily schedule looks a little something like this....

7 / 7:30 am - nurse either in bed (if night has been tiring) or in living room
8 am - oatmeal or rice cereal with fruit puree
8:30 am - play with toys
9 am - nap (anywhere from 30 to 90 mins)
11 am - nurse
11:30 - tummy time/ play time
Noon - lunch (avocado, yogurt, meat..whatever...)
12:30 / 1 pm - nap (30-60 mins)
Nurse when wakes up
(If it's nice out we try to get outside for a walk at least once a day....last nap of the day ideally around 3 or 4 pm for 30-60 mins but this doesn't always happen)
4:30 nurse
5 pm - dinner
5:45 / 6 pm start bedtime routine
6-7 - bedtime depending on level of tiredness

It's working out pretty well. I'm fine with him napping on the go (in a stroller, carrier etc) so long as he gets the sleep he needs. I feel pretty good about it. Now....if only he would start sleeping 8 hours in a row.....seriously, anytime now.

Silas' current favorite toys are his plastic blocks (he has just figured out how to dump them out of the bucket, but not put them back in yet), his rather hideous mousey with wonkey eyes, and links. He loves his cloth books that crunch, and likes to eat his board books (mmm tasty!). He will sit quietly when James reads to him, but he's much more grabby when I try to read to him, but we read every day, nonetheless.

Still number one on his list of interesting things is Pico. She is everything. He watches her and smiles at her and she is not into him at all. Poor misplaced Pico. We give her love and attention but it's not as much as she is used to, so she would be smart to let Silas do it for us.....hahaha!

Well, the boy is awake right on cue from nap #2, so I gotta go!

My loves <3 p="">
Dec 14, 2014

Photo by Erik Lyon

Thursday, December 04, 2014

Silas Meets Santa For The Very First Time!

I took Silas down to Mothering Touch to meet Santa Claus last Friday. I was so excited to do this, and figured I could avoid the general mall craziness by doing so. Plus, it's for a good cause - every year the donations go to a charity supporting parents in need. Win/Win.

First off, it was a total zoo, and as I put my name down, noted that it was a 2.5 hour wait, even though I was there about 15 minutes before it started (wuuuuut). I decided to stick it out, and ended up getting him in after about an hour, so it wasn't so bad after all. Secondly, the deal was a $5 suggested donation, and this got you several pictures snapped with Santa, and a week later, the photographer would send you a free web photo (not suitable for printing, but good for Facebook etc), and you can buy other shots as you wish. I took some pictures with my phone, but intended on buying another shot or two off the photographer...until I saw the price! Each download of a print is $25!! HIGHWAY ROBBERY! I don't feel bad for taking pictures with my phone now! Seriously. There is one print I really think is quite cute - Silas is laying his head on Santa's arm and looks quite angelic, so I *might* cave and buy that, but REALLY. That seems steep, yo. But who am I to put a price on art!? ;)

Anyways, Silas enjoyed his experience with what was arguably one of the best Santa's I have ever seen (granted it has been SEVERAL years since I have been very close to a Santa, but nonetheless). This Santa had a real beard, was super smiley and sweet and just adorable. Silas wasn't scared, more curious than anything. There are no big wide grins from my sweet man, but a few tentatively sweet smiles. Just adorable. ADORABLE.

Observe....

This is one I took with my phone, and ran through Instagram. Love how he's holding Santa's hands. 

Another one I took with my phone. Sweet little man! Also, SANTA'S FACE!

This was the free webshot we were sent today. Chins for days. 

And this is one of the ones I might buy if I decide to give in to extortion. 

THIS ONE. I die. Such a little angel. 
Love it.

The rest of the weekend, we exposed Silas to the Santa Claus parade downtown (he loved the lights on the floats, the music, the people - there was a lot of arm flapping in his snow suit), and then we took him to the Oak Bay Light up on Sunday night, where once again, he got to see Santa and had a great time.
Santa! We meet again!

With daddy and Nana (who was a lot more jolly than she looks in this picture, I swear)

Oak Bay Avenue all lit up!

Post Truck Lights

Everyone looks mesmermized by this post truck. 

Santa Claus parade - my favorite float. 

The Zuyderduyns!

The Olivers!

Daddy and Auntie Liv!

Beautil Victoria at Christmas time :)


Monday, December 01, 2014

Sleeping Like A Baby (aka like CRAP)

Dear 6 month sleep regression,

You can go away now.

Kindly,

Heather


SO TIRED. It's been two weeks of up and downs at night with the small boy. All these new daytime skillz have meant a regression in the nighttime department. I used to be able to put him to bed and count on at least 5 or 6 hours in a row but now...I might get 4, or 5, or 3 or like last night....2. And then the witching hours of 1 - 4 am, when he decides he's going to wake up every hour, and be terribly hard to put back in his crib. And so I give up at 5 am and bring him to bed with us just to get a few solid hours.

I know it will pass, but I gotta say, I'm ready for those mythical 8-12 hour sleeps they say come on between 6 - 8 months with *most* babies. Hopefully Silas is one of THOSE babies because maaaan, lack of sleep is getting me down. And I know I don't even have it that bad compared to some moms. To those moms, I say BRAVO. I don't know how you do it.

I wish coffee didn't give me the shits, yo.






Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Silas Eats Things

From rice and oat cereal to apples and bananas to eggs and chicken to squash and peas and carrots to avocado and yogurt...it can't be argued that Silas likes food!

Except black beans. Those were gross.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Wonder Weeks

We started Silas on solid foods last week and because it's so damn fun to watch him try new things,  I've just been having a ball with it.

After a few days of plain organic brown rice cereal and breast milk (once I was convinced he knew how to swallow things), we moved on to slightly more interesting stuff. He's had egg yolk mixed with banana (yeah that was weird for everyone), pureed organic butternut squash, guacamole, a small amount of porchetta (unsure of that!), mashed black beans (big fat nope), homemade unsweetened applesauce, hardboiled egg, and a few mouthfuls of my smoothie here and there (mango, banana, spinach ). So far he's liked the rice cereal, applesauce, banana, and butternut squash the best. The hardboiled egg went down a little easier mixed with applesauce so I think I just have to perfect my textures with the proteins a little more. At this point I think he needs his foods to be on the smoother side or they just come right back out, so we'll work on that. Either way, my little man is growing up!

Sidenote: my plan was to do baby led weaning but it's way too nerve-wracking for me! I'm going to have to work up to that for both of us I think.

And, as excited as I was for him to try new things, it's meant that we have officially moved on to real poops and smelly protein farts. Like, whoa. Just....wow. The circle of life.

In other news, he also finally REALLY learned to roll this week.  As in, he has done it so many times now that I am now convinced it wasn't just some figment of my imagination or an freak accident. I realized that I was rushing to his aid as soon as he got frustrated on his tummy (because mommy hates the sound of whining OKAY), but that if I just dried my hair or something while he was getting frustrated, he would eventually roll over on his own. And I didn't have to listen to it. Just watch it. And it is amazing. YOU GUYS SILAS IS AMAZING HE IS THE FIRST BABY TO ROLL OVER IN THE HISTORY OF BABIES.

So today I'm making some oatmeal and he rolls over and the next thing you know he has a fistful of cords and all of a sudden it's time to baby proof.  F#@k!

But I'm a proud mommy. He can roll, shimmy and shake his way around a carpet like nobodies business. And he is SO giggly during playtime.  Real giggles for mommy when I pretend to eat his hands or blow on his tummy. Real giggles for dad for just being dad (and also having facial hair). It's so wonderful to hear his little laugh!

All of this development has meant a sudden change in his otherwise pretty good night time sleeping habits. About a month ago I started putting him to bed around 7 30, and he would wake up around 1 and 4 and the up for the day around 7. That was pretty good, though I was looking forward to ditching one of those night feeds eventually. But we were on the right track.

BUT NOW.

For the past 3 nights he has been up every 2.5 - 3 hrs. On a good night, he's up at 11:30, 2:30, and 5:30. On a bad night he wakes up at 10, 11:30, 1:30,  3:45, 5 am....you get the picture.  I get that this is a major developmental time in his life so it's normal but.....I'd like to go back to him sleeping 5 or 6 hours and then 3 or 4.

I bring him into bed at 530 or 6 with me and we have a good cuddle. He is into touching my face a lot (touching = soft caresses and also punching) before he eventually falls asleep next to me. I love it. I love my baby morning cuddles even though it means less sleep for me. One day I'll sleep again. Probably. 

Monday, November 10, 2014

154 Days Old!

And all of a sudden, Silas is five months old!

And with this, he is all of a sudden not needing to nurse as frequently as I'm used to, so we are able to go 3 or 4 hours without me needing to worry about feeding him. It took me a couple of days to realize this, because it literally happened just. like. that! I was confused as to why he wasn't wanting to eat - I thought maybe he was "over" breastfeeding (which makes no sense, obviously) and then it finally occurred to me that I was just trying to feed him too frequently. I don't feel too dumb about this though - he DID carry on feeding every 2ish hours for well over 4 months! This new turn of events is nice. It's easier to get out of the house (not that it ever stopped me!).

In fact, in the last few days I have enjoyed some much needed "me time". On Friday, James took Silas over to his parents house while I got my hair done (cut and bronded - toned down, dark blonde, thankyouverymuch). That took about 3 hours, and then I got lunch, and came home to the exciting tasks of laundry folding, vacuuming etc (It's actually amazing what you can get done when you are not worried about a baby). By the time he got home, I had 7 baby free hours (I had to stop and pump half way through this and got a bottle's worth! SO! This is what it is like when you don't feed a baby every 45 minutes...you can actually pump!).

Getting my hairs did. 

A little shorter, healthier and less blond. 
AND, on Sunday.....we sent Silas off to my parents for four hours so James and I could go to a movie! (Interstellar, it was radical). We dropped him off at 2:15 and Silas was all tuckered out from swimming, so luckily for grandma and grandpa, he actually napped until 4 pm! We got home at about 6:30 and since I hadn't actually fed him since 11:30, I felt like my boobs were going to explode, so immediately fed him for relief, even though he'd had a bottle at 4:30. That'll learn me for not taking my pump in the car with me to pump on the way to the theatre (joking, kind of).


Swimming with dad at Oak Bay Rec!

Looking a little concerned about this turn of events. 



Silas is SUPER interested in what I'm eating and drinking these days, grabbing for my mug or foods. So, today he got his first taste of rice cereal mixed with breastmilk. It was literally about 1/2 a tsp, and it went over pretty well, so we'll try some more tomorrow. It is so fun watching his face register these new flavors. I think we'll stick with rice cereal for a week or two, then try yams or sweet potatoes, and avocados and then move on to meats. I'll continue to breastfeed as well, but this will give him a bit of variety and learning. So fun!

First time in his high chair! 

He's still not really rolling over consistently. He can move like the dickens though - he is a serious kicker and can resposition himself using his legs when he is on his tummy to face whatever he desires. He is so strong. He kicks like the wind when his diaper is getting changed, or when listening to music on the floor. He's our little breakdance man. SO FUNNY.

Silas loves other babies - he is full of smiles and wants to touch, especially his buddy Theo. I looked after Theo for a few hours for Melissa on Saturday, and placing them side by side on the floor was just too much cuteness. Silas was all over Theo, in the most adorable way possible. He was grabbing his arm, and wanted to touch his hair........I died. But only after I took about 10 pictures.

Here are my two favorites:

EEEEEEK! SO CUTE!

SILAS AND THEO FOREVER!

Silas also loves Pico, SO MUCH. He watches her and smiles at her. She is getting better and will occasionally lick his face or hand, and allow him to pet her. He will "pet"her and then grab her fur, which she is not a fan of. It's very sweet and I use her to keep tummy time tolerable. If she was more pliable as a dog, I'd use her as a roll over bribe, but she's not having it at the moment.

James said that so far, this is his favorite age. You can really see his personality emerging - so far, he's a sunny, happy boy with a sense of humor all of his own. He finds it HILARIOUS when I pretend to eat his hands, or give him a tickle or sing to him. He's friendly, and easy going. He likes the pool (he has been swimming 3 times now), and he will happily be held by others, though he turns his head around to look for me. We lock eyes and smile and it's okay.

He is our pride and joy and if we don't have another baby he will seriously think the sun shines out of his ass. BECAUSE IT DOES.

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

21 Weeks

At 21 weeks Silas can.....

* sit up unassisted for 15-20 seconds
* reach for his toys and bring them to his mouth or throw them (or maybe just drop them but hey)
* make a whiny noise that gets on his mom's nerves juuuuuust a little bit
* looks very serious when trying to tell us a story with all his vowels and consonants
* reach for his knees and toes while on his back and roll about (but not really over quite yet)
* showing interest in what mom and dad are eating and enjoys sucking on cool cucumber and carrots (assisted of course). Mom maaaaay start feeding him some rice cereal soon (!!!)
* laughs when I pretend to eat his feet or his neck * play with his toys while on his tummy while kicking his legs to move himself forward
* hates the car seat if the ride lasts longer than 10 or 15 minutes
* loves people and will smile and his grandparents and mom and dad's friends
* reaches out to pet Pico and likes when she licks his hand or nose
* likes to stand on his strong little legs and will hang out in the jolly jumper for 15 or so mins
* likes to sleep in the woven wrap snuggled close to mom or going on adventures in the ergo with dad
* makes angry noises when over tired and then passes out for a naps that last between 30 minutes to 2.5 hrs.
* loves baths and the water in general
* can finally go longer than 2 hrs between nursing sometimes.....we're 3ish hrs now and 4-6 hrs at night :)
* is the light in our life! 

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Silas at 20 Weeks

TWENTY WEEKS!

What??!

Our little big boy is growing up too fast! It's actually incredible to note the swift developments that have happened, especially in the last 2 weeks.

1. He no longer hates Tummy Time and can play on his stomach for 10 - 20 minutes. It wasn't that long ago that 5 minutes seemed like a never ending torture and I secretly feared that he would never like it. All of a sudden, he's on his tummy and enjoying it. His eyes follow Pico around the room, he plays with his toys (mostly putting them into his mouth), and he has even rolled over a few times!

2. He all of a sudden does not hate his Bumbo seat after 1 minute. His neck strength must have increased 10 fold in the last couple of weeks because now I can set him up in his seat with my nursing pillow encased around it with his toys at his reach (his very own makeshift Exercauser aka "circle of neglect") and he will happily sit and play for 20 minutes. This is fantastic for when I want to eat some breakfast without simultaneously feeding him, or if I need to vacuum, or whatever.

3. He has discovered a newer, MUCH louder way of communicating. We joke that our son speaks only in vowels because his little coos and squeaks have turned into much more insistent AHHHH, OOOOOOO, EEEEEEERRRRRRRR's in the past little while. It's hilarious to listen to, and his little face looks so serious as he tries to tell us whatever it is he is scheming. I notice it gets a little louder as he starts to get a bit tired (not crying in any way, just more insistent), so maybe he's telling me something along those lines. It's quite funny but can get a little loud at times. I must teach him to use his "inside voice" soon ;) In the morning, around 6:30/7 am (his wake up times), we will listen to him chatter away in his crib for 10 or 15 minutes before we go get him (just in case he might want to go back to sleep, as he sometimes does). It's really cute.

4. We borrowed a Jolly Jumper off Melissa and he LOVES IT! It's so fun watching him get his recommended 15 minutes of baby exercise. He looks like a Team America puppet. It never fails to make me laugh. Unfortunately, the one we borrowed is a free standing one and takes up too much room in our wee condo, so I am in the market for a door jam one. I found one at Target (Evenflo brand, I believe) for $25 and I think I'm going to nab it for him because it's too fun to watch our little man tappa tappa tappa and twirl around in it.

5. We started putting him to bed between 7 and 8 on most nights so mom and dad could have a little time to themselves. Not that we don't LOVE spending time with the little fella, it's just mom's arms get a little sore at the end of the day. And I realized he actually SHOULD be going to bed, as I was usually just letting him sleep on me while we watched TV or read (also, after consulting the various local mom groups on FB recently, I learned that everyone else is putting their 4 month olds to bed around 7/730 and not 930/10 like I was). No issues there, other than a little minor fussing, and he is off to dreamland no later than 7 - 8 pm on most nights. I put his fan on so it drowns out any noise we might make, and we have no issues. He then wakes anywhere from midnight to 2 am, depending on when he went to sleep, and then again around 5. So I'm technically up 2 times now, as opposed to once (unless I don't go to bed until he first wakes up, but that's just stupid), but the trade off is some me time at night. He's also now in his hilarious Magic Merlin Sleep Suit I bought online at 3 am one night. It looks like a snow suit. It's meant to transition him from a swaddle (which he now busts out of), to a sleep sack eventually. I used it for the first time last night and I got 4 hours instead of 3 after his first wake up, and he's now been napping in it over an hour, which NEVER happens in the morning. Maybe it WAS a good 3 am online purchase! Time will tell if my $57 was a good investment. This nap is telling me that it was.

6. He can sit unassisted for a few seconds. That's pretty cool to watch. He also loves to stand on his legs. My boy is strong. It's wonderful that he is so determined to do these things, and with a big smile on his face the whole time. He's got kickin legs, just like his daddy.
7. He giggles when I wipe his nuts. This is too funny, but hey, I guess it tickles! He also giggles when we put his toes in his mouth, or if I blow raspberries on his neck. He also likes to run his hands down his dad's stubble. He is so quick to smile, it's really lovely. He is a happy baby.

8. I let him suck on a piece of my carrot and a piece of my apple for a few seconds the other day because he was intently watching me eat my lunch. I was tempted to give him some potato/brussels mash the other night, but need to research more on what foods I can introduce and when. I don't want to rush it, but I am excited to watch him try new things soon. Maybe in another 4 or 5 weeks.

9. We took him SWIMMING at the pool for the first time on Sunday! SO MUCH FUN! Silas loves his baths, so I knew he would love the pool. We got a cute little swim diaper and off we went. We floated him on his back and front, and we even gently dunked him twice in hopes of getting him used to having his face in the water early (we read up on it first - blow in his face, make eye contact, slowly lower him in the water for 1 second, make eye contact and happy expressions upon coming up). Absolutely no issues for him, he loved it. AND, totally passed out afterwards in the car (a nice change from absolutely hating his car seat).

10. He loves animals! Not only does he follow Pico around the room with his eyes, he likes to reach out and pet her (she is getting better at being close to him and being a very good dog, but she has her moments, so needs to be watched). He loves Nana and Grandad's dog Charlie (who will lick his face with his big tongue), and Grandma and Grandpa's cats. The awareness of his surroundings has kicked in and it's so amazing to watch him take in the world around him. I think he will love animals just as much as I do.










Monday, October 20, 2014

Small Victories.

I'm going to ramble on in the semi coherent way that new mom's often do, so bear with me. It's one of my goals to try to document this time as much as I can. However, it's tough to type on an iPad while nursing an active 4 month old (like seriously yo, this kid's arms are all over the place now, it's like wrestling a cat occasionally), so it's times like this, when I can sit in front of my laptop and give it my full(ish) attention that I can get all my words out. Because NAPS.

Here we go.

In the last 19 weeks, I have learned that even the smallest victories of parenthood can equal a feeling of great accomplishment.

There are some days when I feel like Supermom, who can literally do anything and everything. Then, there are other days, when I feel like I could have done more not only for Silas, but for myself. You know, like leaving the house, or having dinner prepared, or drying my hair (there is still no excuse for not having a shower in my house. Put the baby in the damn crib for 5 minutes, ladies. It won't kill them, but no one wants to smell like old breast milk or have constant bedhead, amiright?)

Luckily, these days are few and far between, and it's okay to have them. I think it's important to acknowledge that parenthood comes with a learning curve - learning that it's not about you anymore, learning to be unselfish with your personal time and space, learning that it's okay to do a little less on some days, and conversely, learning that doing too much can sometimes backfire and bite you in the ass.

Silas is 4 months old. He's become this small human, no longer a lump of newborn squishiness who will sleep all the time or lay complacently on our chests while we continue to enjoy our leisure time. He's a little boy, with a personality all of his own. He's happy, most of the time. I am so grateful for a happy baby. When he cries, which is relatively rare, it's due to being hungry, or, as I've learned, overtired. The only other time he cries is on longer trips in the car, as the car seat is a now device of torture and mire to our baby, apparently. This can usually be rectified by having one of us sit back there with him and hold his little hand, look in his eyes, and be with him as he realizes that all is well, and the car is a fine place to be lulled into sleep, for a time. There is never so sweet a sound as the silence that follows after a baby screams for any length of time. Sweet sweet silence.

I love being a stay at home mom. I will consider myself this until I have to face the day when I must go back to work. I'm not going to lie, I'm dreading this, even though it's 8 months off. I feel better about my days spent with my son than I do selling hair products. It's not that I don't enjoy, value, or appreciate my job. It's that I feel like I have a real purpose here - to shape MY human. To teach him new things, guide him and help him grow. This feels like real life, and a life I wish I could continue to have with him until he has to go off to school (sniff sniff). People often say that they were ready to go back to work after a time....I am not there yet, and I don't know if I ever will be. But I will go back, because that's the reality of living in an expensive city and having mortgage payments and a desire to travel and have nice things. We both need paycheques until we win the lottery.

I am proud of the way that I have adapted to motherhood. I feel like my learning curve, so far anyways, has been pretty excellent. This is obviously part luck of the draw - Silas was not colicky and has a nice, generally unfussy nature. I have a supportive husband who loves being a dad, and who is more than capable with his son and his own learning curve (has not referred to looking after Silas on his own as "babysitting" for example). We have supportive grandparents all dying to get their hands on the baby, and who I know would take him if I needed some time away from him. And trust me, grandparents, that time will come.

But I also know that I can pat myself on the back because I feel like I've done well. I will be the first to admit that as his birth approached, I was scared. Scared less about the birth, and more about the what was to come after. And then it happened and you just....do it. I feel like being a mother has come naturally to me (go figure, as some of my friends call me Mother Hen). The sleepless nights, the sometimes crying baby, the endless loads of laundry, the naps, the developmental milestones, etc etc etc.......I rock at this. I rock at this because I have confidence and support of my husband, family and friends. I rock at this because I just feel with my whole heart that THIS THIS THIS is what I was made for, and this is exactly what I am supposed to be doing with my life right now. This little boy has made me, someone who always felt content and whole, even WHOLER.

And it's because I feel accomplished in the little things, on a daily basis. This is something I lack in my work life and my "before" life. Every single day, I feel like on some level, we have small victories. Being in sales, you have good days, and you have days where you question your existence and wonder what the hell you're doing. Being a mother, you have good days, and you have bad days, but you never question what you're doing, because you know it's all part of learning and growing. It's okay to make mistakes and to try again tomorrow. There are no sales targets, and your bonus is a smile and peaceful reflection over a cup of tea and a baby who went down gently for a nap. And I say gently because as of 19 weeks in, getting Silas to sleep is a gentle process. We don't cry it out because there is no need for it. If he is truly tired, he will sleep. It's pretty wonderful. Nighttime is a breeze in this way.

Silas is napping in his crib right now for the second time today. This is a small victory. Even though just after typing that sentence he woke up, I was able to put him down again without nursing, just some rocking. These crib naps are a recent development, as we've moved away from napping on our bed, and me side nursing him to sleep. I'm still working on consistency, but we're getting there. It's a learning curve for both of us - him learning to nap in his crib during the day, and me learning to be consistent and get ahead of his tiredness. I'm aiming for naps around 9:30ish, 12:30ish and again at 3ish. Of course, this all depends on when he wakes up and what we're doing but I'm trying to add a little routine into both of our lives because I hear that's what kids like. It's kinda tough though, because then you feel housebound, but naps can also be on the go, so a stroller nap or a wrap nap is still a nap in my books, so long as they happen. However, as the days get more drizzly and cold, I have a feeling we'll be more housebound anyways. This whole attempt at a routine probably couldn't have come at a better time. Thanks for being born in June, son!

I do feel victorious when I do get out for several hours a day, though. It's good for both of us to be in the fresh air, and/or in the company of other people and babies. These days, though more physically exerting (obviously I walk everywhere I go), are the most mentally rewarding and I feel totally "on top of it". More tiring are the days when we stay close to home, weirdly enough. Silas needs more entertaining, wants to nurse more, and I feel the need to do the chores (boooooooo). However, if we can get some good naps, and do the grocery shopping and dinner prep, it's a victory nonetheless. This is what today has looked like so far, and here I am with enough time to write a blog post. I'd say that's winning enough for a rainy Monday.







Yes, there are days when I feel frustrated and rundown and tired and annoyed. Yes, there are times when my patience is tested, and I have reacted rather than acted. I'm human, and I will have these moments of weakness, of selfishness, and impatience. However, I'm learning to rise above them, and to catch myself and love myself and give myself both time and credit and five minutes of fresh air, or a shower, or whatever I need to feel recharged. In moments of impatience, I remind myself to slow down. In moments of frustration, I remind myself to take a breath. In moments of selfishness, I remind myself to be giving. I remind myself that these moments are precious, all of the moments. There will be a day when my arms won't be wanted, when my scent can't calm, when no one calls out for me in the night. And I remind myself to be present and calm and grateful for all that I have.

And this is a victory too. To be aware of my "flaws" as a human, to simply do my best, to know that my best is enough and that I am enough and that one day I'll get a full 8 hours of sleep again.


Silas at 19 weeks: loves being tickled, being sung to, putting his hands on daddies and my face (HILARIOUS STUFF!). He is a great party date. He smiles a lot, and is learning to hate tummy time just a little bit less as the days go by. He goes to bed between 8:30 and 11, generally, and will sleep anywhere from 4 - 6 hours in a row, then another 2-3 hours in a row. I usually only have to get up once a night, but the last few days it's been twice a night (teething? A wonder week?), but these nighttime nursing sessions are down from 45 - 60 mins to 20 - 30 mins. I feel lucky that I have a pretty good sleeper on my hands, considering he is exclusively breastfed (another small victory!). He finds getting his diaper changed pretty funny sometimes. He likes looking in the mirror, and will smile at his reflection and mine. He'll play laying on his side, but hasn't rolled over yet. He's officially OUT of his swaddle and into the sleep sack (I maaaaaay have jumped the gun on buying a gimmicky thing called the Magic Merlin, which just arrived today....oh 3 am online shopping, you got me).

xh









Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Silas' First Thanksgiving

I'm thankful for being able to share Thanksgiving with my baby and my family.  We had a lovely weekend that included lots of eating (lunch at Pag's, dinner at Marion and Aren's, Tapas Bar and the real feast at my parents house...I think I made a food baby this weekend 😕). James got some surfing in, I got to relax at the mineral pools at the  Oak Bay Beach with my mom,  and we hiked Mount Doug . It was an excellent long weekend. 

Silas is starting to notice what I'm eating.  I'm excited at the prospect of giving him food at Christmas . It will be fun to watch him try new things. And maybe a bit terrifying for me.

Silas is still super into his hands - they are the tastiest! He is also into chewing on my hands aaaaaaand sometimes my face. This would maybe be gross if it wasn't my baby but I love it.

The wee man still has a case of the sniffs but seems to be okay otherwise. I try to get him down for naps during the day...these can last anywhere from 20 minutes to 3 hours. No rhyme or reason. So naps are a work in progress, but nights are still going pretty well. He usually wakes up around 3 and again at 7 (give or take), so it's nice to get those 5 or 6 hour stretches followed by a 3. Ahhhhh sweet sweet sleep.

No more rolling since the two rolls a few weeks back but lots of kicking and the ability to move around a bit. He is getting stronger and stronger.  He loves to stand on his legs....I'm borrowing a jolly jumper soon that I hope he will enjoy.

What can I say? Life is busy and fun with the little apple of our eye. He's 18 weeks today!

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